Addiction to porn. Addiction: Truth, Reality, and Hope for Partners

For a long time, the argument against porn revolved around the idea that giving in to its allure constituted some sort of moral failure. From a religious or Christian perspective, it related to sinfulness. a manifestation of lust and/or gluttony, two of the seven supposedly worst sins, which is a sign that one has allowed oneself to become infected with them. Alternatively, porn is viewed from a feminist perspective as the heinous use of women as sexual, leakhive one-dimensional objects with no humanity other than form. However, as Naomi Wolf notes in her article The Porn Myth, excessive exposure to pornography has really had the opposite effect of turning men into sexually voracious beasts. Instead, it has made men emotionally and sexually anorexic, unable to relate to or be aroused by real women. As it turns out, males are turned off, not on, by excessive pornographic viewing in this digital age.

Numerous studies now demonstrate that men (and an increasing number of women) who repeatedly and compulsively watch online porn have the opposite effect from what one might anticipate. Just as someone who is addicted to a substance becomes more and more desensitised to the drug while continuing to crave it, someone who is addicted to pornography finds that they end up on pretty much the same, well-worn treadmill. a strong need for something that is no longer able to give temporary comfort or stimulation.

According to recent studies, internet pornography has similar brain effects to various substances in terms of addiction. However, porn's unique selling point is that by introducing hormones that are typically linked to bonding, love, and connection into the mix, it taps into that human urge for attachment, connection, and belonging even more than addictive substances. A porn addict essentially develops a stronger attachment to porn than to anything or anybody else in their life. Relationships, marriages, careers, and eventually one's relationship with oneself suffer as a result.

Porn addiction goes through stages, just like any other addiction, but unlike most other addictions, its bodily effects are almost imperceptible and its psychological and emotional repercussions are first very subdued. In fact, before anyone bothers to inquire about their porn viewing habits, many porn addicts may seek treatment for a range of mental health conditions like anxiety, melancholy, and OCD as well as physical problems, stress, other addictions, and finally poor sexual performance.

But an increasing number of studies show a direct connection between excessive online porn use and problems with sexual performance, such as erectile dysfunction in males in their late teens and early twenties (something that was virtually unheard of 10 to 15 years ago). Some guys don't begin to link their binge-watching of porn to other problems in their lives until they can no longer achieve an erection or ejaculate even when watching porn. This is frequently the single thing that eventually captures their interest. (If they have partners, they may have been aware of anything happening—or rather, not happening—for some time.)

Both porn addicts and their relationships are in horrible shape as a result of this sorry state of affairs. Numerous people spend countless hours in bed with a partner who never seems to be "in the mood" for sex. Marriages, other relationships, and both persons' self-esteem may suffer as a result. Because most men's addiction to pornography is so covert, some partners might not even be aware that they are in a relationship with a porn addict. Even if they are aware of their partner's pornographic habit, they might not initially connect the dots. They might not be aware of their partner's level of porn consumption. The harm this does to relationships is by no means quantifiable. According to one website, among other startling data, 56% of divorces in the United States involve a party that has an obsession with pornography.